Monday, June 11, 2012

(untitled)

Seumur jagung baru usianya tapi sudah banyak hal dilihatnya. Kelakuan-kelakuan hasil asuhan kaum pinggiran.

Pagi harinya diisi dengan pemandangan para pekerja yang terbirit-birit, tangan-tangan pencopet yang gesit, kenek yang teriak-teriak sampai suaranya limit, para preman yang bertampang sengit. Hari-harinya  menantang terik metropolitan, menerobos hujan, dan melewati air kubangan.

Saat istirahat dilihatnya para kenek dan preman bus yang perutnya macam tas pinggang dan kerah bajunya yang terbuka memesan kopi. Ia juga melihat para preman, kenek, dan sopir yang menggoda mbak-mbak penjaga warung kelontong, warteg, dan warkop - mbak-mbak yang suka berpakaian ketat dengan motif atau gambar yang bikin para karyawati kantoran nggak habis pikir kenapa ada orang yang selera pakaiannya macam begitu, yang mutar Iwak Peyek kencang-kencang dari hand phone limaratusribuan, dan yang mukanya belang akibat dempulan sekenanya. Sekali-dua kali mereka memelototi bokong penumpang perempuan yang berbalut jeans ketat atau pun rok span. Kalau sedang iseng, di-siul-in lah itu penumpang malang.

Sore hari saat jam pulang kerja, ia ikut bermacet-macet di lampu merah. Melihat pengamen-pengamen, pengasong kemoceng-makanan-minuman, dan polisi yang seenak jidat buang ludah. Kalau sedang sial ia turut terkena ludah.

Malam harinya ia istirahat di terminal. Tak jarang dilihatnya pasangan mesum yang main hanya beralaskan koran di depan toko-toko yang sudah tutup. Kadang pasangan-pasangan itu main didekatnya sampai mani si laki-laki mengenainya. Satu malam orang gila yang berkeliaran di daerah itu mengajaknya ngobrol ngalor-ngidul tentang keluarganya di kampung; bapaknya yang tukang kawin dan ibunya yang suka main dengan teman-temannya sesama tukang ojek, kakak pertamanya yang jadi TKW dan mati diseterika majikannya, kakak keduanya yang menuruni hobi bapaknya -main perempuan- padahal kerjanya hanya satpam, dan adik bungsunya yang butuh uang sekolah dan nggak tahu apa yang dialami keluarganya. Puas si orang gila bercerita, kadang ia dirangkul, dicium, atau ditendang kuat-kuat. Di malam lain anak bau kencur yang mabuk akibat minuman oplosan muntah di atasnya.

Jijik. Sungguh jijik. Untung ia bukan manusia. Ia adalah ban bus Lantjar Djaja yang baru diganti beberapa bulan lalu. Dulu ia tinggal di tempat penyimpanan suku cadang sebuah tempat servis kendaraan yang sempit dan gelap. Senang sekali ia ketika dibawa keluar dan jadi roda kemudi bus Lantjar Djaja. Ternyata tinggal  di Ibu kota tidak lebih baik dari pada tinggal di tempat penyimpanan.

-S

so we can make it the weekdays

WE ALREADY GOT STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN
AND A HIGHWAY TO HELL
BUT WHAT WE NEED THE MOST
IS DORAEMON'S DOOR
SO WE CAN MAKE IT THE WEEKDAYS.

-S

Wednesday, June 06, 2012

Mimpi

Dika senang sekali. Akhirnya setelah bertahun-tahun absen dari acara reuni geng kuliahnya, tahun ini Dika bisa hadir.

Lima tahun sejak hijrahnya Dika ke Eropa. Tujuh tahun setelah sama-sama memakai toga. Tahun ini, Dika menyempatkan diri untuk pulang. Demi memberi jeda pada rindu yang membudakinya.

Semasa kuliah, sekali-dua kali Dika dan sahabat-sahabatnya mangkir kuliah. Pergi ke kebun raya dengan kereta ekonomi untuk mengoceh tentang mimpi.

Ada Lita, si penganut mahzab pantang pulang sebelum subuh saat weekend, dulu punya mimpi kawin dengan kaukasian kaya raya berusia setengah abad dan tinggal di Roma. Kini Lita bersuamikan seorang pengusaha furnitur dari Jember dan memiliki butik busana muslim. Jo dulu bercita-cita menjadi pengacara sukses dan menikahi Puteri Indonesia. Sekarang ia memang menjadi pengacara yang cukup sukses, tetapi cita-citanya menikah belum diamini semesta. Lintang dulu bercita-cita menjadi interpreter PBB. Sekarang ia punya dua pekerjaan; siang hari sebagai sekretaris perusahaan dan malamnya sebagai partner masokis Mr. Boss. Danu dulu ingin hijrah ke Negeri Paman Sam untuk mengejar mimpinya berlaga di Broadway. Belakangan setelah ayahnya kabur dengan selingkuhannya, ia mengubur mimpinya dan mendirikan usaha servis mobil. Danu menikahi perempuan keturunan keraton dua tahun lalu. Sejak kuliah, Dika memang berkeinginan untuk minggat dari negerinya dan menetap di Eropa. Ia ingin menikah dan hidup di sana.

Tidak semua pemimpi dapat menjinakkan dan menghidupi mimpinya. Dika senang mengetahui sahabat-sahabatnya dalam keadaan baik dan berkecukupan.

Namun masih ada satu mimpi Dika yang ia harap dapat ia jinakkan. Dika ingin mendapatkan pemilik rindunya. Anak Adam yang dicintainya setengah mati. Yang membudaki kerinduan hatinya. Sahabatnya.

Beberapa bulan sebelum Dika bertolak ke Eropa, ia pernah menyatakan perasaannya. Mengajak separuh dunianya hijrah ke Eropa untuk menikah dan tinggal di sana. "Maaf Dik, aku nggak bisa ninggalin Mama dan adik-adik. Harus ada yang jaga mereka. Aku harus tinggal dan aku nggak bisa nikah sama kamu. Aku akan menikahi perempuan." kata Danu.

-S

Saturday, April 14, 2012

s'up?

I turned 22 last week, and I thank god for that. What I've accomplished then? I have no idea to answer that question thou. I got my bachelor degree, first job, but still no boyfriend. The last thing doesn't really matter for me thou. Not bad.

22nd is the second-most-awaited-age for me (the 1st is the 17th of course). I remember back then when I was 17th, I imagine what will I bacome when I was 22nd. If I'm not mistaken, I imagined that I'll have that bachelor degree and start to live my dream job. Yeah, this is actually my dream job lately when I was in college. So, I can't thank God enough.

At D-day my mother bought me a birthday cake, mocha flavor, so yummy. Too bad I forgot to take a picture of the cake ergo I can't post it. but who cares anyway.

The worst part was my so-called-old-besties forgot D-day. None of them greeted me. Such a disappointment for a special day, no? I don't care. Because luckily I have those friends whom still remember my birthday. I don't care either if they really remember my birthday or they got it on their reminder or they knew from facebook/twitter etc. That's terrifying to finally realize that your existence in the real world is replaced by your existence in social media.

Here's the end of this post. Seems like I used too much "I don't care" here. Maybe that's the reason people don't care of me anymore. Later. xx

-S

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Confession

Hi, I'm 21 years old girl. Straight. Just got my BA degree in French Studies from Universitas Indonesia, the wildest intellectual playground in my country. I passed all of the subject in uni and achieve all the 144 credits only in 3.5 years. My GPA is upon 3, not in the top of the class.

Here in my country, when a girl hits 20 people start asking when you'll getting married. People refers to friends and relatives. They usually start by questioning about your boyfriend. To make you clear, I already hit 20 but I have no boyfriend. I'm straight. I have a crush in uni but they're nothing more than just a fresh meat to catch. The thing is, I always get excited when it comes to flirting but when I really got this fresh meat he's no longer got my issue. Point number one, I always want to go after something but when I get that thing, that's just it.

Second. As I'm straight I'm going to end up with a man, no? How can I end up with one of them if I already labelled them as the second gender? Yes, welcome to my world where women is the first (and maybe the one and only) gender. I'm sorry but I don't know how to put it delicately. I mean, men are careless, lazy ass, some of them are not so much clever, etc etc. They even incompetent in doing group work. Please, people. Clearly, for me, they CAN'T do anything but failing around. 

And what the society told me is gays are everywhere. Watch out, ladies! 

So, what's the point ending up with someone whose intellectually or mannerly below me? I wonder if only God is all powerful, He'd sent me a man who will never ever fail me and humiliate me and himself in the rest of this very short life.

I wanna tell my mother that I'm sorry not to put the wedding plan on my A-to do-list, I don't even know whether I have one. I know every mother must be eager to see their own daughter wedding but sorry mom, it won't happen very soon. I want to have my master degree, then my Ph.D, my career, my car, my flat, my branded bags, shoes, and cosmetics. ALL is mine. Just so I'm not sound so selfish maybe I can put this, I hope to find a miracle (red: man who won't fail me and humiliate himself and me in the rest of this very short life) when I enroll as a master student in Europe. That's all I want, dear God. If only you're reading my blog.

I don't know why I end up posting this kind of settling down thing instead of my graduation photos at the first place. But all I want to say is ONE DOESN'T SIMPLY GETTING MARRIED. You got me crystal clear, k?

-S

Monday, February 13, 2012

How Do You Handle This?

How can you get any attention from someone whom you just met once whilst you live in a totally different world?

So, there is one man who takes over for the most part of my daydream. He's really got the package. Brain, behavior, and beauty. But the one and only problem I got here is, him and I live in a totally different world. He's no longer a student, quite out of reach actually. I don't know where he works. I don't have his number or even his BB's pin. The only one source I could use to (occasionally) stalk him is his Facebook account. He has no twitter, no multiply, nothing. Bet he has a very interesting real life out there.

I want him. I am falling for him. He's the 2nd guy, after that friend whom I always have a crush on, I want to tie the knot with. May Thee give me a chance to meet that guy and know that guy better. May Thee give me a ticket to travel to that guy's world and stay. Amen.
sketch by Inslee Haynes


-S

Friday, February 03, 2012

The Best "Goodie Bag" Ever

Saya masih ingat benar, kali pertama saya memakai Jaket Kuning, jaket alma mater Universitas Indonesia. Hari itu saya menjadi bagian dari paduan suara mahasiswa terbesar yang dimiliki Universitas Indonesia atau bahkan mungkin yang dimiliki Indonesia. Saya beserta ribuan mahasiswa baru Universitas Indonesia angkatan 2008 berkumpul di Balairung untuk menyanyikan Gaudeamus Igitur dan beberapa lagu lain untuk kakak-kakak wisudawan & wisudawati.

Saya merinding. Betul. Such an honor to be with the best (and terribly lucky) students in the country in a huge choir. Sorry if that sounds cliche and wonker. Yeah. Totally.

That day, I imagined I was one of the leavers. Wear toga. Sit in the first two rows, where the cum laude students sit. I always dream it until a year ago. But as the subjects pass, I realize that is not that easy to sit in those rows. I didn't make it as a cum laude, but at least my GPA and my non-academic activities went quite well. ;)

Today is my uni 62nd birthday. I don't give 'em a present, but vice versa. My uni give me the best "goodie bag" every students ever wanted. That's not really a goodie bag, you know, that's just a parable. So, at 3 pm today (if I'm not mistaken), at RTC UI with its adorable Kolegas, I opened this well known student website called SIAK NG to check whether my academic status has already changed or not yet (yes, I'm waiting for my graduation lately). And here what I got:


HOORAY! My academic status finally changed. That was the goodie bag. Well, I don't know if my uni even held the birthday bash because I'm not invited but the most important thing is I got the best "goodie bag" ever.

It's like, OMG I need to struggle for 7 terms, achieving 144 credits, passing 46 subject with 92 exams, and collecting zillions deadly assignments to finally could walk down the aisle. Nah. To finally could get to Balairung. I was like happy, sad, proud at the same time. Oh, I'd like to congratulate my friends who made it too: Adek Impianna, Ajeng Ayu, Audi Pratama, Nindia Satiman, Wanda Widya, and Annisa Purbandari.

Since we all know that SIAK NG's server is bad oftentimes -and frustrate almost all of UI students-, I finally bump in to time when I adore SIAK NG. That time will come when your academic status changed, from "active" to "graduated".

Et aussi, je veux remercier mes professeurs pour toutes les lecons qu'ils m'ont donne. Je suis peut-etre une fille moyenne en classe mais je ne vais pas simplement oublier ce que vous m'avez enseigne, dans la classe ou bien en dehors. 

-S

  Photo by Photos Hobby via Unsplash Old wounds are not worth revisiting. -S